I won't be giving my diamond ring to HIM

1). When talking about Uranus as the "sleepy planet with rings" one of my students raised his hand and said, "It's like a ball lying down with a tutu." Whatever works I guess!

2). Two excitable blonde haired darlings ran up to me during play time asking if I knew what planet we were all on. (Obviously they were still fascinated with the way cool science lesson we just had earlier.) "Last time I checked we were on Earth." "No we're not! A___ and I just discovered a new planet! Well, first we went to Neptune, but we found another blue planet and it rains diamonds, and we made diamond engagement rings and we're going to find boys to give them to us!" They clap their hands in sheer delight.

3). At lunch one of my students was eating dehydrated kale. After I inquired about it he informed me, "Yeah, and the enzymes aren't dead in it either!"

4). Boy: "Mrs. McKanna, A___ is bothering me. She's thinking out loud again." (Proceeds to demonstrate what it looks and sounds like to think out loud while working on a math problem. Just so you know it involves rolling your eyes in the back of your head and sticking your tongue out.)

Me: "Did you ask her if she could be a little quieter?"

Boy: "No."

Me: "Sometimes people don't know when they're doing something. I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you asked her."

*Takes his seat. Little do I know how soon those words are going to be the death of me.

Girl (who was bothering boy): "Mrs. McKanna, am I hurting H___'s feelings?"

Me: "He was just having a hard time concentrating. Do you think you can try to keep your thoughts from being spoken while he's working?"

Girl: "Yes, ma'am."  

*Takes her seat. 30 seconds go by and A____ comes up to my desk...again.

Girl: "Mrs. McKanna, H_____ is making faces at me now."

*This is when I realize I just need to talk to the both of them together.

Me: "H____, are you making faces?"

Boy: "Sometimes people don't know when they're doing something."

How dare he use my words against me! What followed was a teachable moment after he admitted he did, in fact, know full well what he was doing.